and then it started raining

Before boarding the plane
my step-dad gave me some sudden advice
“Don’t accept free food samples”
I suppose being poisoned
is a fear that I had yet to acquire

but at last here it is

I sipped from a glass of wine
elegantly placed
between a marble statue and concrete

on the third sip, I found myself upstate
in the closing part of winter

there I was, staring at the ceiling fan
trying to convince the man in the red wool sweater
to paint over
all of the thin black lines
I had painted on their door

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gratefully sad

The more shit that happens,
the stronger (softer) I become.

I have to go take this face mask off
and brush my teeth

remember that it is all
temporary

every interaction
I had with that person
felt like I was cycling
through all of the emotions

every single one
in the speed of light

thrown into black hole,
and shot out of a cannon,

Lines that are reoccuring
written down

Nothing that I could say

You are what you underline,
what you bookmark,
you are the songs
that bring the past to the present,

the first thing you do when you get home,
the last thing you say to your dog before you leave,
the shoes you wear out,
to their final thread

the things you observe are valuable,
don’t feel that your view of the world is wrong,
it’s different

Love is often
one sided,
if it is double sided,
it’s uneven

words will never
translate the heaviness

I am still dissecting you,
every eye movement,
the pattern of your speech,
as if trying to come to a conclusion
in my favor

This is what led to my break,
I wanted so badly to have you
that I made it happen in a dimension
unknown to others,
my imagination.

Love is an act of madness