avoidance dance

We sat across from each other
or maybe I was standing
but ,
were definitely sitting

with the heaviest feet
grounded on the floor
arms on the arm rests
as if to say this is my chair
and I’m not going anywhere

you get up and leave the room
after I look at you

and then the pattern repeats

we haven’t even met yet

The last sip of coffee is usually cold

Today I am wearing a sweater,
leggings, and clogs.
I will create the November,
that should have happened last.
My coffee is in a mug,
to temporarily forget that plastic exists.
College aged girls are studying,
reminding me sweetly
of my failed experience.

I am sweating profusely, it’s 90 degrees
and humid, why am i wearing this?
This mug only
results in extra work for the barista.
They probably hate the people
who use their mugs.
Why did drop out?
Can I actually make it without a degree?
Well it’s not my fault that I went crazy.
My mind doesn’t work the way I want it to.