undone

Before seeing him, I had an image of him making us coffee in the morning because that is what the romantic part of me says to the rational side, in order to keep going. I think he knows, because he’s asking me with his eyes lowered.

Problem #1: I’m a hyper romantic whose known to take that clawfoot bathtub that’s been hiding in grime and age. Squeezing every ounce of marble and rain while setting candles.

The next step is to drop rose petals while whispering hopes into them. Like that time, I wished for a really cute high school boyfriend. I whispered into an egg on a spring day and then buried it my backyard. There was no one around. I was eating an orange, filling the air of what was once an attic into a tangerine. At one point I had to stop myself from looking out of that window.

All of the words that i’m not saying are translating and its problematic. All of the parts of me that i’m trying to hide are only being seen by this person, and maybe a few others, but this person seems important to me. But maybe he’s not realizing it in the moment. The bad part is that he doesn’t see it turning into anything. I don’t know what he means by anything but i’m losing focus.

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