mostly in delusion

Spewing things out of my mouth,
shit that I don’t mean, in response
for a response,
I see that guy and I can’t pinpoint
the reason that he looks different
distant, a person
that I have never met before,

I eat the salmon that ruins the vegetarianism,
look up at the sky
remember to look outward,

He looks different because he shaved his beard
I refer to him as that guy
because I have been hurt by him
don’t want to admit to myself
how deeply in love with
that guy
I still.. I am

I am, I am,
he doesn’t look up once

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